Science jokes for kids! A collection of jokes & puns for children that’ll make them smile, laugh or maybe groan a little 🙂
Either way, we had fun listing them… enjoy!
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Chemistry jokes
- Did you hear the joke about Sodium hypobromite?
NaBrO - I don’t trust Atoms. They make up everything!
- A sodium ion walks up to his friend and says “Dude, I think I’ve lost an electron.”
His friend asks “Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” the sodium replies, “I’m positive.” - I make terrible science puns, but only periodically
- What do you do if your chemistry teacher is sick?
If you can’t Helium or Curium, you Barium. - I was going to tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon.
- A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender
“How much a for a beer?”
The bartender replied, “For you, no charge.” - There’s a night club just for chemistry students…. I hear they’re really good at dropping the base
- I was reading a book on Helium.
I couldn’t put it down. - I heard today that the molecular formula for water is no longer H2O…… it’s now HIJKLMNO
- Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
Na - 2 men walk into a bar.
#1 says: I’ll have a glass of H2O pls. After drinking it all, he was refreshed.
#2 says: I’ll have a glass of H2O too. He drank his glass & died.
Hmmmm. Do you know why? - My science teacher took a drink,
Now she shall drink no more,
For what she thought was H2O,
Was H2SO4. - Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK. - If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they’d be alloys.
- If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
- Organic chemistry is difficult.
Those who study it have alkynes of trouble. - Why are chemists great for solving problems?
They have all the solutions. - What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel. - Helium walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve noble gases here.
“Helium doesn’t react. - Molecule 1: I just lost an electron.
Molecule 2: Are you sure?
Molecule 1: I’m positive. - When Magnesium and Oxygen started dating I was like, “OMG!”
- Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They’re cheaper than day rates. - What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
CoRnY. - What does a teary-eyed, joyful Santa say about chemistry?
HOH, HOH, HOH! - How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?
Avocados number - Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium Batman!
- I would make a chemistry pun but it’d be easily miscible
Biology jokes
- Why do tigers have stripes?
So they don’t get spotted. - Why did the germ cross the microscope?
To get to the other slide! - Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because it has dorsal and ventral horns. - Biology is the only science in which multiplication is the same thing as division.
- Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who visited 30 different countries and spoke 6 languages?
He was a man of many cultures. - What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags a tail and the other tags a whale. - What did the dog say to his owner?
“My favourite frequency is 50,000 hertz but you’ve probably never heard of that.” - What did the stamen say to the pistil?
I like your style! - What did the microbiology student get for being late to class?
A tardigrade. - How much room do fungi need to grow?
As mushroom as possible. - Do you know the name Pavlov?
It rings a bell. - Two blood cells met and fell in love.
Alas it was all in vein.
Physics jokes
- What is a physicist’s favourite food?
Fission chips. - “What’s the matter?”
“Solid, liquid, gas” - Einstein developed a theory about space.
It was about time too. - You Matter!
Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light…… then you energy - A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.He says, “No, I’m travelling light.”
- Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
He’s 0K now. - Why is quantum mechanics is the original “original hipster”?
It described the universe before it was cool. - What is the name of the first electricity detective?
Sherlock Ohms - What did one quantum physicist say when he wanted to fight another quantum physicist?
Let me Atom - Have you heard that entropy isn’t what it used to be?
- Where does bad light end up?
In a prism. - What did one uranium-238 nucleus say to the other?
“Gotta split!” - Why is electricity an ideal citizen?
Because it conducts itself so well. - Which books are the hardest to force yourself to read through?
Friction books. - What happens when electrons lose their energy?
They get Bohr’ed. - Unknown Fact: You can be cooled to -273.15C and be 0K.
- What do we want? Time travel!
When do we want it? Irrelevant! - I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.
- What does a subatomic duck say?
Quark!
Astronomy jokes
- If you’re thinking about telescopes as a hobby, you should look into it.
- How do astronomers organize a party?
They planet. - It is reported that Copernicus’ parents said the following to him at the age of twelve: “Copernicus, young man, when are you going to come to terms with the fact that the world does not revolve around you.
- How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it! - How do you know when the moon is going broke?
When it’s down to its last quarter.
Geology jokes
- What did the volcano say to his wife?
I lava you - On tectonic plate bumped into another.
“Sorry, it was my fault” - Wanna hear the mountain joke?
Nah, you won’t get over it - Why do Geologists go to concerts?
To get their “Rock” On. - Where do geologists like to relax?
In a rocking chair - My rocks are gneiss, don’t take them for granite.
- Some of these jokes just fluorite over my head
Mathematics jokes
- Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
To get to the same side! - What did the 30 degree angle say to the 90 degree angle?
“You think you’re always right!” - Why can’t you argue with Pi?
It’s irrational. - There are 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
- What do you call a number that can’t sit still?
A roamin’ numeral - Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?
They already 8 - What did one maths book say to the other?
“Don’t bother me, I’ve got my own problems.”
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