Science jokes for kids! A collection of jokes & puns for children that’ll make them smile, laugh or maybe groan a little 🙂
Either way, we had fun listing them… enjoy!

Search by type

• Chemistry jokes
• Biology jokes
• Physics jokes
• Astronomy jokes
• Geology jokes
• Mathematics jokes

Chemistry jokes

• Did you hear the joke about Sodium hypobromite?
  
  NaBrO
  
  
• I don’t trust Atoms. They make up everything!
  
  
• A sodium ion walks up to his friend and says “Dude, I think I’ve lost an electron.”
  His friend asks “Are you sure?”
  “Yeah,” the sodium replies, “I’m positive.”
  
  
• I make terrible science puns, but only periodically
  
  
• What do you do if your chemistry teacher is sick?
  
  If you can’t Helium or Curium, you Barium.
  
  
• I was going to tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon.
  
  
• A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender
  “How much a for a beer?”
  The bartender replied, “For you, no charge.”
  
  
• There’s a night club just for chemistry students…. I hear they’re really good at dropping the base
  
  
• I was reading a book on Helium.
  
  I couldn’t put it down.
  
  
• I heard today that the molecular formula for water is no longer H2O…… it’s now HIJKLMNO
  
  
• Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
  
  Na
  
  
• 2 men walk into a bar.
  #1 says: I’ll have a glass of H2O pls. After drinking it all, he was refreshed.
  #2 says: I’ll have a glass of H2O too. He drank his glass & died.
  Hmmmm. Do you know why?
  
  
• My science teacher took a drink,
  Now she shall drink no more,
  For what she thought was H2O,
  Was H2SO4.
  
  
• Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
  
  It went OK.
  
  
• If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they’d be alloys.
  
  
• If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
  
  
• Organic chemistry is difficult.
  
  Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
  
  
• Why are chemists great for solving problems?
  
  They have all the solutions.
  
  
• What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
  
  A ferrous wheel.
  
  
• Helium walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve noble gases here.
  
  “Helium doesn’t react.
  
  
• Molecule 1: I just lost an electron.
  Molecule 2: Are you sure?
  Molecule 1: I’m positive.
• When Magnesium and Oxygen started dating I was like, “OMG!”
  
  
• Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
  
  They’re cheaper than day rates.
  
  
• What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
  
  CoRnY.
  
  
• What does a teary-eyed, joyful Santa say about chemistry?
  
  HOH, HOH, HOH!
  
  
• How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?
  
  Avocados number
  
  
• Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium Batman!
  
  
• I would make a chemistry pun but it’d be easily miscible
  
  

Back to top

Biology jokes

• Why do tigers have stripes?
  
  So they don’t get spotted.
  
  
• Why did the germ cross the microscope?
  
  To get to the other slide!
  
  
• Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
  
  Because it has dorsal and ventral horns.
  
  
• Biology is the only science in which multiplication is the same thing as division.
  
  
• Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who visited 30 different countries and spoke 6 languages?
  
  He was a man of many cultures.
  
  
• What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
  
  One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
  
  
• What did the dog say to his owner?
  
  “My favourite frequency is 50,000 hertz but you’ve probably never heard of that.”
  
  
• What did the stamen say to the pistil?
  
  I like your style!
  
  
• What did the microbiology student get for being late to class?
  
  A tardigrade.
  
  
• How much room do fungi need to grow?
  
  As mushroom as possible.
  
  
• Do you know the name Pavlov?
  
  It rings a bell.
  
  
• Two blood cells met and fell in love.
  
  Alas it was all in vein.
  
  

Back to top

Physics jokes

• What is a physicist’s favourite food?
  
  Fission chips.
  
  
• “What’s the matter?”
  
  “Solid, liquid, gas”
  
  
• Einstein developed a theory about space.
  
  It was about time too.
  
  
• You Matter!
  
  Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light…… then you energy
  
  
• A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.He says, “No, I’m travelling light.”
  
  
• Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
  
  He’s 0K now.
  
  
• Why is quantum mechanics is the original “original hipster”?
  
  It described the universe before it was cool.
  
  
• What is the name of the first electricity detective?
  
  Sherlock Ohms
  
  
• What did one quantum physicist say when he wanted to fight another quantum physicist?
  
  Let me Atom
  
  
• Have you heard that entropy isn’t what it used to be?
  
  
• Where does bad light end up?
  
  In a prism.
  
  
• What did one uranium-238 nucleus say to the other?
  
  “Gotta split!”
  
  
• Why is electricity an ideal citizen?
  
  Because it conducts itself so well.
  
  
• Which books are the hardest to force yourself to read through?
  
  Friction books.
  
  
• What happens when electrons lose their energy?
  
  They get Bohr’ed.
  
  
• Unknown Fact: You can be cooled to -273.15C and be 0K.
  
  
• What do we want? Time travel!
  
  When do we want it? Irrelevant!
  
  
• I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.
  
  
• What does a subatomic duck say?
  
  Quark!
  
  

Back to top

Astronomy jokes

• If you’re thinking about telescopes as a hobby, you should look into it.
  
  
• How do astronomers organize a party?
  
  They planet.
  
  
• It is reported that Copernicus’ parents said the following to him at the age of twelve: “Copernicus, young man, when are you going to come to terms with the fact that the world does not revolve around you.
  
  
• How does the moon cut his hair?
  
  Eclipse it!
  
  
• How do you know when the moon is going broke?
  
  When it’s down to its last quarter.
  
  

Back to top

Geology jokes

• What did the volcano say to his wife?
  
  I lava you
  
  
• On tectonic plate bumped into another.
  
  “Sorry, it was my fault”
  
  
• Wanna hear the mountain joke?
  
  Nah, you won’t get over it
  
  
• Why do Geologists go to concerts?
  
  To get their “Rock” On.
  
  
• Where do geologists like to relax?
  
  In a rocking chair
  
  
• My rocks are gneiss, don’t take them for granite.
  
  
• Some of these jokes just fluorite over my head
  
  

Back to top

Mathematics jokes

• Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
  
  To get to the same side!
  
  
• What did the 30 degree angle say to the 90 degree angle?
  
  “You think you’re always right!”
  
  
• Why can’t you argue with Pi?
  
  It’s irrational.
  
  
• There are 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
  
  
• What do you call a number that can’t sit still?
  
  A roamin’ numeral
  
  
• Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?
  
  They already 8
  
  
• What did one maths book say to the other?
  
  “Don’t bother me, I’ve got my own problems.”
  
  

Back to top

Love science? Have a blast with a science party!

Know more jokes? Tell us them!
Write your best (PG) science jokes below. The punnier the better!